*******Warning Long and well its long******
A Most of you know we got a call on the 11Th letting us know that they found Josh's mom dead in her bed. The sad part is after we were married Josh worried that this would happen and sense he lost touch with his mom here and there because she didn't have a stable environment we would hear from her when she needed money. He check obituaries often and worried that he would find her picture there. You see Josh's mom struggle with drugs. But a cool thing happened about 2 yrs ago. She got arrested and yes I said cool...You see that was the beginning of her changing her life around. 6 months later she had a stable living place she had a happier attitude and I think that she finally loved being off the drugs. she started calling more often on birthdays and to check on us she would talk to the kids ( I and still not sure if Ella knew who she was talking too). (she is a fan of my mom and Grandma Lorrie who she talks about all the time...) But she would still ramble on and talk. So I would have to say that that call was a it of a shock for us ALL!!
the next two days were filled with packing funeral arrangements and tying up loose ends here. I would have to say at this age I never thought that I would have to plan a funeral and Josh wasn't sure what to do with himself at first. I had heard that that autopsy took a while but not hers they found the cause of death quickly. She died dues to a asthma attack that was aggravated by smoking. We think she must have been sleeping when she had it because she had inhalers all around her.
they released her body the next day and told us we had to get e mortuary to pick her up...I was here and his brother was on the road so I started calling mortuary's and found one that I thought we could all agree on. I called his aunt and his brother and suggested the place. His brother wanted to check the place out first. His brother was struggling Bad...bless him! He was trying to stay so strong...but hay its your mom who isn't going to cry. The though of loosing my mom after hearing this mad me hurt inside. I think as part of his grieving Tyler ( Josh's brother) need to do his part and deal with the funeral. he called us the next day and agreed to the place and we had them pick her up. Now that she was taken care of we could go. We loaded up our car that night and left the next morning. We made on quick stop in Sacramento and dropped things off to my sister that she was going to take care of for me!!
The road...ugghhh took 14 hours to get there...I have a bruised tail bone and the kids were bored after Elko and done with the trip!!! We stopped to eat there in Elko...but only the casinos were open that was the smokiest dinner ever and the kids kept pointing at the "games" and couldn't understand why only adults could play...after all the were "games"!!!
the next two days were filled with packing funeral arrangements and tying up loose ends here. I would have to say at this age I never thought that I would have to plan a funeral and Josh wasn't sure what to do with himself at first. I had heard that that autopsy took a while but not hers they found the cause of death quickly. She died dues to a asthma attack that was aggravated by smoking. We think she must have been sleeping when she had it because she had inhalers all around her.
they released her body the next day and told us we had to get e mortuary to pick her up...I was here and his brother was on the road so I started calling mortuary's and found one that I thought we could all agree on. I called his aunt and his brother and suggested the place. His brother wanted to check the place out first. His brother was struggling Bad...bless him! He was trying to stay so strong...but hay its your mom who isn't going to cry. The though of loosing my mom after hearing this mad me hurt inside. I think as part of his grieving Tyler ( Josh's brother) need to do his part and deal with the funeral. he called us the next day and agreed to the place and we had them pick her up. Now that she was taken care of we could go. We loaded up our car that night and left the next morning. We made on quick stop in Sacramento and dropped things off to my sister that she was going to take care of for me!!
The road...ugghhh took 14 hours to get there...I have a bruised tail bone and the kids were bored after Elko and done with the trip!!! We stopped to eat there in Elko...but only the casinos were open that was the smokiest dinner ever and the kids kept pointing at the "games" and couldn't understand why only adults could play...after all the were "games"!!!
Finally at 4:30 in the morning we rolled into Lehi were my aunt lived...she let us commandeer her spar room for what seem like to me FOREVER!!! the first thing the next day we dropped the kids off to my cousin Mel ( thanks again Mel you are the best) so we could go to his moms house to find her social security card so that they could issue a death cert...In fact they wont do anything with her until there is a Cert! So we were making a mad dash to find it. We actually stumbled across it rather quickly and made it back to pick up the kids in time to go to the mortuary to do all the last bit things to get the cremation on its way. We went out to dinner with his brother and Timmi his wife that night. It was nice to slow down and catch up with each other.
the next day we went to his brother Tyler's house to plan the obituary and funeral. that was a mad dash because when we talked to the people there they said we had to have it in in 30 Min's or it wouldn't run so there was a mad dash for the next 30 Min's to get it in. We got the writing in but not the picture but the newspaper was kind and let us run one down there late and get it in. I was grateful that they did it was something that Tyler really wanted!
Tuesday we got up and ran off to get the stuff for the program done. we had to run back up to salt lake first thing and grab a picture then back to Orem to my aunts work and get it all scanned and into the computer. it took a few hours sand we were set. We had to go find paper and and get a few thing for the funeral. that evening I stopped at my aunts and uncles house and we hung out with them for a few hours before heading home to rest the next day started early.
OK so this morning I talked my cousin into cutting all of our hair.First I got colored and then as the foils were in my hair...Josh got a complete buzz and a beard trim...he looked great. Then Ella got a trim with some layers her hair it is so cute. Next Brandon got his first hair cut.
After Brandon got done my hair was finished up by a cut and my hair being done...I loved it. The kids loved that they got to play with Shanda's kids the whole time....
After this was the funeral I will blog about that tomorrow!!!
3 comments:
wow, there is so much to do for funerals and they expect you to get it done in days if not hours. I am am sure Josh's mom appreciated all the hard work you put into making her funeral special and to be the support that Josh would need. And thank goodness you have so many friends and family to help you out in utah!
I loved having your kids. They were adorable. I know you were busy and you had alot to do but it is so rewarding to do that for someone. It's kindof like a way to show your final respect.
BTW-Did you hear that janices mom passed away this last weekend. Her funeral is today. I was not sure if anyone told you guys or not.
no no one told us! that is so sad...man Janice has been through it rough these last 15 yrs!!!
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